The Inception

During my years on this earth, I have successfully managed to avoid anything a loving, lasting relationship. But I fear my time is running out. I have decided to commemorate my years of playing games and frolicking around before some significant other turns my brain to mush and I forget my glory years. I shall share my tricks, my tips, and my mistakes so you can learn how to a better version of your current self- you can thank me now.

167 thoughts on “The Inception

  1. Pingback: For Men’s Eyes Only « Ella Elle L'A

  2. I am really feeling your blog. The originality is wonderful and the substance is relative to many young women treading water in the dating pool. Keep writing. I’ll keep reading.

  3. Typo aside I am all in. I got my pen and notepad and eagerly taking notes! By the way, thanks a million for the “Like” on my little corner of the universe. Ciao.

  4. Hey Ella! Thanks so much for liking a recent post of mine – so glad you did, since it led me here! Your writing is open, honest, and hilarious, and I’ll definitely be back.


  5. Super fun, I always love a single blog haha

    You might want to think about joining a single blogger’s network of women called Single Edition (google and check it out). It’s a great way to expand your own network, see you on the blogs!🙂
    (do you tweet?)

  6. Miss Ella,

    … That is where our agreeableness ends.

    Unfortunately, I was disappointed to see so much sexism and hate placed towards the Male side of the human race. I am one of those 20-30 year olds you mentioned in “For Men’s Eyes Only” in which you discussed men in this following age criteria as… Tools. Well thank you for preconceiving my personality before even meeting me. Honestly, i loved your beginning, wishing to “empower young women in the dating scene” and you use your… experiences as examples. In fact, much of what you did say about men, and them not having to act like body parts, I could easily turn it around and say the same about women. In fact much of what you seem to “criticize” about men, one could easily turn around and criticize about women.

    I choose not to go off into a tangent and degrade my point, But i do wish to say this:

    Most of your advice, though constructive in many respects, is also very generalized. Your trying to create a one stop shop guide to dating the 20 something man. A noble goal, if not futile. We are human beings, we act, react, we change, we differ, we are the infinite variable. To create a guide is like buying technology. Buy the latest gadget and a week later it is outdated and not including the various expansions and addon’s.

    Women are complex. Individually, that’s debatable at times. Exact same thing can be said for men (Trust me, I have seen some dumb… dumb men…) But to say that any person between this age and this age is a tool, or a bitch, or an idiot, is a fallacy.

    Could it be perhaps that you have not chosen your men appropriately as well? maybe there is a nice, perfect boy, who happens to be less attractive, less assertive, or perhaps shy to talk, that you haven’t considered in your “Discarded men” (Which makes me feel a bit like your comparing a person, a human being to a tampon or napkin) Section….

    All I’m saying is A guide needs to be written… depending on situations. A new guy, a new guide. Sure it may contain sections from previous guides, but it is still a New Guide.

    That’s my opinion, and again, thanks for the like. I look forward to hearing your opinion.


    • Unstable,

      I am flattered that you would take the time to compose such a lengthy response. In short, I feel that one can never “win ’em all.”
      I appreciate your insight. Thankfully, these posts have found the majority of the audience well.

      I couldn’t possibly accept all the compliments and endorsements, without the occasional dissent.

      Thanks for reading!


  7. Love! Hilarious. Keep it up, though I’ve no doubt that one day, there will be that one to turn your insides to mush, because my thought process was much like yours, a few years ago.

  8. I must say I have enjoyed reading your blog! Very creative! In the world of dating we all have a story or two…………Keep telling yours in this fun and insightful way! Kudos!!

  9. I’m going to be following your blog because I was laughing out loud. I’ve had a few of your experiences! I hope that run into each other again.

  10. love it…while im not sure if my world is ready for your world…i did kinda sorta mention you in my blog today…i live a long way away so i dont think you will hunt me down.

  11. Okay, first of all… thanks for reading and liking my posts. Secondly, I really should’ve visited your blog sooner. Your writing style is fabulous, the content is interesting and your personality really comes through in the humor. And fifthly (math = not my best subject), looks like you’ve got really good readership numbers. Any suggestions are welcome.😉

  12. Awesome blog……. shared the link with my girlie….
    I have to say I was a virgin till I was married. I married young, and there were a few close calls, but I have to say I was a virgin. After 23 years of marriage divorce came around. Now I am on this dating scene of craziness. Is there any normal men around for real?

  13. This is my first time to your blog and and can I just say “WOW”. This looks fabulous! I’m looking forward to really getting into it. Too bad I didn’t have something like to use as a reference 20 years ago… uhh… I mean 25! Thanks again for stopping by!! 🙂

  14. Thank you, Ella, for stopping by and liking my post!

    I’ve just read your post “Choosing A Fraternity Formal Date” and I think it’s brilliant. If I were living in the USA, and young enough to be still at college, I would do the impossible to get you as my date😉


  15. We all make mistakes. None of us are perfect. You just gotta distinguish between the non-perfect and the f’ing a’holes.

    Keep writing, Girl!

  16. I was under the impression that blogs had a kind of automatic disclaimer, that being said, I am impressed with your acceptance of criticism as well as praise. To me that shows a gracious and humorous personality. Enjoy yourself safely until you turn to mush, as you say, I personally love my mushy state and hope for the best for you! (Whether that is mushy or not.)

  17. Miss Ella! Nice to see someone else channeling their experiences into something creative. I’ll have to check back in and see what other morsels of insight you have to offer.

    Take care,


  18. this amazing blog! I’m almost 22 and recently single (I was engaged to my HS boyfriend) so this is so relatable… & hilarious. Love it!

  19. Thank you for recently stopping by and my blog that talked about my managomy since I was a teenager. Married in my early twenties but didn’t rush to the alter because I was withchild. I didn’t believe in marriage. Both my husband and I came from divorced families. So far 12 years later it’s been the greatest adventure. Don’t feel pressured and trust me I started very young. Me & the hubby was old souls before we married. Lived a lot of life way too early. I think a lot can learn from your point of view and openness. ~Blessings on your journey.

  20. So I DO have a doppelganger… I’m certainly glad her and her blog are as Dope as mine! So far this is VERY entertaining and true… exactly what I go for myself! Do you write anything else?

  21. Thanks for stopping by at Colltales. Your blog is intriguing, perfect as a sunny day, an iced drink and pleasant conversation. Will come back often. Best

  22. Love your honestly on this blog. Nice read since you keep it real instead of PC. Ur blog reminds me of myself a few yrs ago…lol. Im a little past the frollicing now, but I know ur truth will help the young ones on their way up! Love it!

  23. Monogamy. Not exactly the scaries word in the English dictionary….but close. I know it scared the crap out of me. But I took at chance a long time ago. Tried to make it work. Had some great times and some lousy ones. In the end it didn’t work. But – I will say this – it taught me so much about myself. It taught me so much that I gave it another shot – and go figure…it’s fun!

  24. Pingback: Blogging aint easy. | thetosinteatime

  25. hahaha your blog just brightened up my day, taking me down college memory lane! Good luck at finding what you are looking for🙂

  26. I have found your blogs both amusing and informative. In fact, I find myself becoming fascinated with your take on the world.

    I am sure you have logged it somewhere, but in fresh words that come out of the present moment, describe the details of what you would consider an ideal man.

      • I should let you know up front that I am a happily married man for two decades now. So, I have no alternate agenda of getting my name in your infamous column of the DISMISSED. In the couple of sentence you wrote, tells me you are getting closer to finding that perfect guy

      • You may should have. Although I am happily married now for nearly 20 years, I was very much a womanizer in the years prior to that. I am going to draft a post just for you. I expect you will find a certain value in knowing a guy like me.

      • Maybe you should have. That would have been one of my tactics to meet u. B4 I found true love, I was a certifiable womanizer and can recognize my kind from a distance. My next post is for u and girls like u.

      • Can you please forgive me for my delays in replying. I have more than one account open, and one wordpress acct was for the purpose of writing about my numerous travel experiences, but I posted incorrectly. CONT’D

      • CONT’D
        I found myself unable to keep pace with all of the comments that started coming in. It caught fire with a combustion I would have never dreamed of.

        Despite trying to get to 100 or more comments every day I just checked my last notification, which read:

        Currently 1,477 comments are waiting for approval. Please visit the moderation panel:

        Those blogs are located under or some variation thereof.

        I am in the middle of designing a spiderweb network of sites that will connect together and the aggregate would be to showcase my entire body of work, from acting, modeling, art, music, and, writing, of course.

        My sudden spike in traffic made things difficult for certain browsers and some other errors were mentioned in the comments I have read so far.

        You will always be my first…person I followed. I am now following others, but not near as many as I wish for…I just need the time, or to make the time…


        It was so good to hear from you again. You are welcome to checkout my other site, using my name kris halley and matadoru should get you there. I was told my blog is front and center in most search engines-they were commenting on SEO.

        Keep in touch, hon
        and as always,
        be well and BE HAPPY

  27. I asked u 2 do that for the purpose of visualizing & focusing on what qualities u see in your perfect guy-get a clear picture, believe he is real, and expect to meet him very soon (b4 end of year, maybe)

  28. Great Blog! I can’t believe I have only just found this! I find myself the oposite. I dream of the day when monogamy shall turn my mind to mush, but I have taken to chronicling my slipups and mishaps in the meantime!

  29. think your blog is pretty dope, especially since we’re like, the antithesis of each other, with you being beautiful and having men like you and with me. . . not. Anyway. Thanks again for the ‘like’ and for stopping by. Come back soon.

  30. Pingback: (Dumb) Shit Guys Say (to Me) « Ella Elle L'A

  31. Holy crap!! You remind me of a character that I wrote about a few years ago, and just added to my short story blog. You actually ‘liked’ her story which is why I came to check out your blog. Too funny!!

  32. Hey Ella. Glad I found your blog, I’ve just spent an enjoyable time reading through your posts – you remind me of me when I was 22 (not that I’m THAT ancient now!) Continue to have fun and keep writing. I’ll definitely visit again! X

  33. Ella, Happy blogging…and dating- I would hate going back to the dating scene. My daughters are your age and it’s hard to watch😉

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